maybe I should take "project management" off the CV

Why am I a great project manager only when I'm doing stuff for others, coerced by a job description that is, and then at my utmost project managerness only when completely stressed out?

This job thing is killing me. Retail is looking pretty good. Deer In Headlights Syndrome has come to stay. If I were doing this for someone else I'd be full of ideas and action.

It reminds me of my favorite Flannery O'Connor quote, from "The Misfit":
She would of been a good woman if it had been somebody there to shoot her every minute of her life.
If someone could move in here and hold a shotgun to me or at least stick me with a pin every time I'm just sitting and staring at the computer, I'd probably get a job in no time.

I guess I'll just postpone the "Consume less caffeine" part of the '08 resolution list since stimulants are my best muse/taskmaster in the absence of a pin-pricking overseer. Come to think of it the bulk of my work for both conferences and the homestay was caffeine-fueled, so I guess I had simply forgot how key its role was... Oh, wait, see above "completely stressed out."

Completely scrogged.

1 commentaire:

Applecart T. a dit…

I know!

I have a perfectly sunny Saturday, no galleries to attend, no evening dinners or parties looming in the evening hours,

and I have spent two or three of them barely rearranging my bedroom/office

–– all I could accomplish was cleaning giant dust creatures (I swear I am going to get rid of this down comforter; even the other blanket, a harmless woven cotton number, sheds continuously and makes tangles in my hair), clearing Christmas trash off of the empty file cabinet, upturn said cabinet, add scooters to save the floors, move it to a place I thought would work (based on an "inspired" drawing I made months ago), get discouraged, move it elsewhere, restore empty drawers, remove stickers from seven Sterlite and Rubbermaid storage bins purchased in December and intended to empty hallway of "what the hell are all these boxes" still cluttering everything. Bins and drawers are still empty.

I am uninspired. My nails and cuticles are a wreck, I need a haircut, I have an exam in a bit more than a week, and I think that 3:30 is acceptable for starting dinner, don't you?

Forget the timer –– what is the Feng Shui trick for making a room make your creative juices flow? I think if I just added something green over on the west side here, it would do the trick? : )